Skip to main content

Jasmin

When you were born I was in the 6th grade. I vividly remember that day. I went to class gladly telling my friends that you already came after a long wait. Perhaps being the eldest child, I had that rare opportunity to be a silent witness to all of you, my siblings, coming to the world.


I was in Manila when you were growing up. Dad and Mom sent me to the city to further my studies. I stayed there til I finished my graduate work. Though I went back in between breaks and during holidays, I still felt that I never really saw you blossomed into a young lady. I felt that I missed something.


When I decided to teach and stay, then I realized that you were not a child anymore. I have my own world and you have yours. I did not understand that. All I knew then was that you should fit into my world, that we belong to the same world.


I was wrong. And that was my greatest mistake.


I tried to make amends of the things I took for granted. You were one of those. I never truly bothered to ask you how you were or what was up with you. Most of the times I just assumed that everything was fine with you and that you had your life to live. Again, I was wrong.


I may not fully understand you. But I am trying. I am aware of the difficulties you are trying so hard to overcome. You are determined to win the battle of your life.


And I want you to know that I am with you. No matter what happens I will always be your big brother. I also want you to realize that I appreciate all the things you have done for me, your concern and love, your understanding.


You have made me feel that you were there for me.


Let me make you feel that I am here for you.


Happy Birthday, sis!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Course Starts

Today the course of which I am the superviosr started. I had 15 participants. There was no one from Myanmar, 4 paying participants from Thailand and one from Kenya. This afternoon, I gave them the briefing and it turned out to be wonderful. Though there were those who could not communicate well with English, it should not deter them in fully participating in every session. When I was one of the particpants back in 2004, I felt the difficulty of having them as co-participants. It is as if asking them why were they here in the first place. Now that I am the supervisor, I see it in different perspectives. Language is important but should not be a barrier to communication. I told them if they could not say it, then write down. If they could not put it on papers, then make use of sign language. If still it is not possible, then use facial expressions. The thingi would like to get across at is that we have to find ways and means to express ourselves. In our first session this afternoo, I enc...

How

It was already late. Sleep never wanted to disturb me from thinking. It never wanted to liberate me from the pain I was going through. I kept on thinking, thinking til I was numb. I could only feel the throbbing pain that's left after. I would have wanted to free myself from this misery. That early dose of sleep would be quite a relief. But I could not find any of that. My body was begging for some well deserved rest after a long day. Yet the day was made longer by my petty foolishness. This has been difficult for me. I know there was nothing to expect. I did not expect for your message, your email, your sms, your visit, any of that. I did not expect you to greet me on our special day. I did not expect you to show up. I did not expect you... And I expected myself to be this lonely. There was nothing I could do but to allow the tears washed the stain on my cheeks. It went down to even wash the dust that covered my neck. Til it refrained from further flowing down...the tears stopped ...